i see a post talking doom and gloom about how we’ll never escape toxic masculinity. i think about back in 2017 when american girl released their first boy doll, and a review for him went viral in the collecting community. the review was written by a mom, who said they went into the store to get their daughter a doll, only to see their son’s eyes light up like fire when he saw a doll that looked like him, and now every night he puts his doll in pajamas and rocks him to sleep. i think about the toddler in my daycare room a few years back who was obsessed with baby dolls, carrying them everywhere, and his mom proudly told us he uses his sisters’ old baby dolls and wants to be just like them. that toddler saw another toddler crying one day and gave her the doll he had to cheer her up. i think about the eight-year-old boy i saw a few years back, excitedly waving around raya’s sword in a target checkout line like all his dreams were coming true. there was a video on my instagram the other day of a little boy at disneyworld crying with joy upon meeting his hero, mulan. i think about the voice actor for bow in the she-ra reboot saying his nephews only wanted adora action figures. celebrity men are wearing dresses on tv now. last halloween i saw a little boy dressed as elsa. i went to go see spiderverse over the summer, and in the line ahead of me was a boy who couldn’t be older than twelve or thirteen, bouncing and beaming, giddy with excitement over getting to see the female-led romance movie elemental. i think about the five-year-old boy at my library who breathlessly asked me where the pinkalicious books were, eyes widening when i had more on my cart, his mom explaining that he is all about pinkalicious and fancy nancy. i saw so many pictures online of boys and men dressed in pink to see barbie. teenage boys are gonna open their phones and see the man who wrote fucking game of thrones dressed in pink to see barbie. when i was a kid, a boy dressing in pink was practically a social death sentence. there are boys running around in pink on my street right now.
Remember The Blind Side starring Sandra Bullock? The movie showed how a kid who had an extremely rough upbringing got help from the family of a school friend, found success in football and ultimately ended up being adopted by the family. Turns out he was never adopted.
Michael Oher says that he was tricked by the Tuohy family into signing documents that made them his conservators. Since he was already 18 at the time the family told him, âthat it means pretty much the exact same thing as âadoptive parents,â but that the laws were just written in a way that took [his] age into account.â
Oher also says that papers were signed so that his story and likeness were given away for free to use in The Blind Side. He also never got a single royalty check for the hugely successful, Oscar nominated film in the 14 years since its release.
It just continues to baffle me that they essentially purchased a young Black manâs life to make football money off of, like buying a racing horse, except a person. Like, I donât know how else to say it. And then made everyone think it was something wonderful they did to âsaveâ an âimpoverished, Black boyâ, and heâs been saying it for years to no avail that they took advantage of him!
It makes perfect sense when you learn how white people have used the black body to their advantage for centuries. This story and film hasnât sat right with me almost since it came out so Iâm not surprised, but I am deeply saddened for Oherâs experience of being taken advantage of.
The article gets into this, but the movieâs also super fucking gross in how it portrays Oher and his life.
For one thing, it chose to portray him as a slow kid who got into the private high school he graduated from because the Tuohys showed the football coach how, uh, big and athletic he was. In reality, he was a smart kid who impressed the principal of the school by demonstrating academic focus despite his chaotic home life. This change is so straightforwardly racist that I donât even feel the need to elaborate on it.
The movie also decided to make the Tuohys the ones who introduce Oher to football, even though in reality he already knew how to play and was already excelling in the high schoolâs team before ever meeting the Tuohys. This change is honestly fucking bizarre. Itâs like the Tuohys felt like their white savior fantasy wouldnât be complete unless it was literally complete, totalizing, with themselves directly responsible for every aspect of Oherâs success.
Anyway, Oherâs taking the Tuohys to court; hereâs hoping he can finally get whatâs his. He also has a book out.
listen to me. i do not care how old you are or how silly you think something is. in this world you have to take the things that make you happy and be all about them. itâs the only way youâre gonna survive.
this is why iâm absolutely throwing a tiny birthday party for my plush possum Turnpike in two days bc august 18th is her birthday. sheâs gonna be 1
we need to destroy the idea that girls should wear makeup. normalize bare faces on prom queens and flower girls and cheerleaders. no products at all instead of ‘7 product simple makeup routine.’ no more 10 step skincare and regular facials and dermablading and gua sha just to be comfortable with yr natural face. i want to see eye bags on the funny librarian and acne on the swim coach and wrinkles on all our adult role models. i want to see a 16 year old girl that has never tried putting on eyeshadow. i want to see a 7 year old girl who doesn’t have to go out and buy powder for her dance recital. i want to see trans women and girls everywhere to never have to wear makeup, regardless of how well they 'pass.’ no more 'contouring to look masc’ either. a post-beauty industry world is possible
+ if it wasnt clear this post is explicitly trans inclusive :]
this is good and correct except perhaps for the dance recital one, which I’m concerned isn’t aware that any performance under stage lights really does require makeup for everyone, any and all genders, because a) otherwise the lights will make you look weird, off-color and maybe unwantedly glowy, and b) the audience won’t be able to make out your facial features and expressions if you haven’t deliberately exaggerated them with makeup. This one’s not a beauty standard, it’s a practical theater thing.
